To find out if you need God, you must ask yourself some very important questions.

Are you a good person... by God's standards?

And if so... are you good enough to go to heaven?

This test is designed to answer 2 questions:
Are you a good person according to God's standards?
And if so, are you good enough to go to heaven?

NOTE: Some questions are scored as a group, and others are
scored separately. The questions may appear out of numerical order.

1. Have you ever told a lie?
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTION #1:
The Ninth of the Ten Commandments is "You shall not lie." Telling just one lie, according to God's standards, makes you a "liar." In Revelation 21:8, God says, "...all liars, shall have their part in the lake of fire..."

7. Have you ever looked at someone and had lustful thoughts?
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTION #7:
The Seventh of the Ten Commandments is "You shall not commit adultery." If you've ever looked at another person with lustful thoughts, according to God's standards, that makes you an "adulterer." Jesus said, "You have heard it said, You shall not commit adultery: But I say to you, that whoever looks on a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart." (Matthew 5:28) In 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, God says that no adulterers "...shall inherit the kingdom of God."

5. Have you ever used "God," "Jesus," or "Christ," as a curse word? (Example: "Oh my G-d!")
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTION #5:
The Third of the Ten Commandments is "You shall not take the name of the Lord in vain." If you've every used the name "God," "Jesus," or "Christ" as a curse word, what you've done is take the name of the God who gave you life, and you've used it as if it were a "four-letter" filth word to express disgust. That offense is called "blasphemy," and according to God's standards, you are a "blasphemer." In Leviticus 24:16 , God says, "he that blasphemes the name of the LORD, shall surely be put to death..."

4. Have you ever stolen anything (no matter how small)?
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTION #4:
The Eighth of the Ten Commandments is "You shall not steal." Stealing just one thing (regardless of it's size or monetary value), according to God's standards, makes you a "thief." In 1 Corinthians 6:10, God says, "No thieves... ...shall inherit the kingdom of God."

8. Have you ever broken the first Commandment?
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTION #8:
The First of the Ten Commandments is "You shall have no other gods before me." That means that we should love God with all of our heart, mind, soul and strength. The Bible tells us that no one has kept this commandment (see Psalm 14:2-3) -- if you said you had, you have also broken the 9th Commandment by lying.

2. Have you given money to charity?
3. Have you gone to church regularly?
6. Have you made it a practice to read the Bible regularly?
YOUR SCORE ON QUESTIONS #2, #3, and #6:
Giving money to charity, going to church, and reading the Bible are all good activities--but none of them impress God. The Bible says, "and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away." (Isaiah 64:6) That means, all our "righteous acts" -- these "good deeds" that questions 2, 3 and 6 asked about -- can never make up for the fact that we've broken God's Holy Commandments. Think of it this way. If a person was guilty of a serious crime... such as murder... but he gave money to charity, does that make up for his crime? No. The person's crime hasn't been paid for because he gave money to charity. This "good deed" will mean nothing to the judge when he passes sentence. The murder must still be punished.

RESULT:
This test showed you how you stand up when judged by just five of God's Ten Commandments. So, if God judges you by that standard would you be innocent or guilty of breaking His Commandments?

You would be guilty.

Do you think you would go to Heaven or Hell?

You would go to Hell.

Does the fact that you're
headed for Hell concern you?

It should concern you.

It should concern you. Would you sell one of your eyes for a million dollars? How about both eyes for ten million? No one in their right mind would! Your eyes are precious to you... but they are only a "window" for your soul. Your soul (your inner being, your life, your personality) looks out through those eyes. Consider how precious your eyes are... then realize that Jesus said that Hell is so horrible that you would be better off tearing out your own eyes than ending up there for all eternity (Mark 9:43-48).

Do you know what God did so that you wouldn't have to spend eternity in Hell?

Think of it this way... Imagine you're in a courtroom again, you're guilty of many serious crimes. The judge says, "It's a fine of $500,000, or prison." You don't have anywhere near that amount of money, so the bailiff begins to walk you out of the courtroom when someone you don't even know appears. He runs up to the judge with a check and says, "I've paid the fine for you." Now that the fine has been paid, the law no longer has any hold on you. You're free -- because of the gift you were given.

This is what God did for you by sending Jesus to die on the cross in your place. So that you wouldn't have to go to Hell, God sent his only Son, Jesus, to die on the cross -- suffering the punishment that justice demands. Then He rose from the grave, forever defeating death! The Bible tells us, "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him, shall not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16) If you will repent of your sins and put your trust in Jesus, God says he will forgive all your sins and grant you the gift of everlasting life. Just like the court case we just talked about, if you repent (that means to confess and forsake your sins) and put your trust in Jesus, then you will not have to suffer God's justice in Hell because the payment for your crimes was made by Jesus on the cross.

If you're not sure what to pray, read Psalm 51, and make it a model for your prayer. The words are not "magical," what God cares about is the attitude of your heart. When you pray, it should sound something like this, "Dear God, I repent of all my sins, such as (name them). I put my trust in Jesus Christ as Lord (to say Jesus is your Lord means you are now making Jesus the master over your life) and Savior. Forgive me and grant me your gift of everlasting life. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

Now read your Bible daily, and obey what you read. God will never let you down.

What should you read? We suggest that you start in the book named "John," and then read the one named "Romans." Whatever you decide to read, make sure you read every day.

We now suggest that you read "Save Yourself Some Pain" which contains 10 very important steps for new and growing Christians.

Ever play it? Great game! played it on facebook today!
If you never played it you need to. Go to: http://games.adultswim.com
This game is puts the awe in awesome!

Know any good ones? Just got done with Gotrek and Felix... I'd recommend it.
Other good fantasy stories are in a few video games:
Fable: Lost Chapters
Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind
Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
~Other Elder Scrolls....
Any others?
(Besides Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter 'cause those are given....)

Stumble upon lead me to some crazy $#*+!
Try it...
Best art sites ever!!!
If you know any art sites post 'em!

http://www.billing.hostdemon.net/clien ts/aff.php?aff=011

Instructions...
1. Click mine
2. Signup
3. Affiliates
4. Post your link as a comment and I'll click yours

He's teaching my English class for a couple of weeks after we get back from Christmas break. I've had him as a teacher already for about a fortnight and he's been driving the class mad! I find it morbidly hilarious.
He claims he was a comedian, but I don't much believe him. Though it would explain his habit of ranting randomly about topics pulled from thin air.
He's one of those nerds that go to comic book conventions. (Not saying there's anything wrong with that.)
Mr Carte may possibly be the BIGGEST douche bag I've ever met. God help his future students and God help me for the rest of the semester. (Though I do have a break from him over Christmas.)
He continuously argues with the class. I actually enjoy arguing with him though.
Have you ever wished you weren't automatically on first name terms with a teacher? That's almost how I feel except he calls me by my nickname given to me by my friends back in seventh grade. MY LAST NAME IS CRABTREE @$$HOLE!!! NOT CRABS!!!
The worst thing about him is his smart comments. He's such a smart alec that he actually, at one time, had me convinced that he actually misunderstood the most simple concept conceivable by a young woman in the tenth grade.
Nobody really likes this guy. Every chance they get, my class will talk about how much they hate him behind his back.
Now that I think of it, Mr. Carte may end up reading this! He is a nerd, after all, and may visit this site. He has mentioned that he once Google searched his name just for $#*+'s and giggles, so maybe he'll come across it. Maybe I should, but I really don't care.

Magically Delicious! Morbidly Hilarious! -- LAWL!!! They're similar!!!

Hope to write again soon,
Your #1 Dirty Jew Fan,
Vladimir Crabtree

I want to start an art collection in my favorites. If you have any suggestions for me, please don't hesitate to send me a link.
Thanks,
Vladimir

Before I say anything else I'd like to say I hope you all had a happy Halloween this year!
Check out my favorites! They're all Halloween!!!
(Though tomorrow I will be disappointed because it's no longer Halloween.)
Was it a waste of time? I don't think so!

http://images.encyclopediadramatica.co m/images/thumb/c/ca/WhenNightFalls.jpg /200px-WhenNightFalls.jpg

Look at that pic...
It's the creepiest thing I ever did see.

Drip, Drip, Drip

One night a young girl, Lily Foster, is left alone for the night, in her country house, while her parents drove out to town for a party. This was fine with Lily, especially since she had her faithful dog, Scout, protecting her throught the night. She made herself something to eat, and sat down at the kitchen table. Turning on the radio to her favorite station, she was surprised to hear a news bulleten declaring that an avenged murderer was on the loose. It advised that people secure all windows and doors as a safety precaution. With her dog by her side, the young girl locked the front and back doors. She went from window to window, and locked each of them one at a time. She reassured herself that she would be fine with her trusty dog, and that her parents would be home shortly, anyway. So, Lily had a pleasant, peaceful evening, and finally decided around eleven o'clock that it was time for bed. She climbed the stairs to her bedroom, and slid under the big, warm blanket on her bed. Before closing her eyes, reached her hand down under the bed, and allowed her dog to lick it- she did this every night, because it comforted her. A short while later she awoke to the sound of a scratching noise at her bedrooom window. She eyed the window, and reminded herself that the whole house was locked and she was safe. She stuck her hand under her bed and felt her dog's slobbery tongue cross over the palm of her hand. She sighed and went back to sleep. An hour or so later she sat up in bed...She had heard footsteps in the hallway, and crept out of bed to see if it was possibly just her parents returning from their party. Seeing nothing, she returned to bed. As she was about to stick her hand under the bed, she heard a drip, drip, drip, followed by some footsteps. She walked downstairs into the kitchen and secured the the taps. That surely wasn't the source of the drip. She crept upstairs and climbed into bed. "This is silly," she told herself "I'm probably just imagining things." She stuck her hand under the bed, and felt the dog lick her hand. An hour later she awoke again. A little mad at this point, she jumped out of bed. The dripping wasn't coming from the kitchen so it must be from the bathroom. She crept along the side of the hallway, and walked into the bathroom. She groped along the side of the wall with her left hand, looking for the light switch. She flicked the light on and gasped. There, hanging from the shower rod was Scout-skinned-a pool of blood had formed on the bathroom tile with a continuous 'drip, drip, drip' as the blood from the dog hit the ground. Something on the wall caught her eye; written on the wall was a message in blood..."Humans can lick too."